Three Ways to Overcome Imposter Syndrome

Have you ever like a fraud? Much has been written about imposter syndrome, the feeling that we are “faking it,” and someone, sometime, somewhere will discover our scam. 

Over the years of coaching high performers, I am always struck by how commonly many successful, accomplished people question their abilities.

Recently, I was co-leading a workshop for school administrators. When asked about the gap between the leader they are today and the leader they aspire to be in the future, many of them identified a need for greater confidence.  Some admitted to imposter syndrome.

When I hear about some of the challenges leaders are facing and how hard they work to keep their various constituents satisfied, I am amazed at how well they cope. Even people with many credentials, a lot of experience, and much success  are feeling worn down by the constantly rising expectations.

All this to say that if you feel like an imposter, sometimes or all the time, you are not alone.  In fact, you have a lot of impressive company.  And I too have experienced my own attacks of doubt and uncertainty about my abilities at times.

And here are some things I’ve learned that have helped me and might help you to manage doubt, uncertainty, and lack of confidence.

1. Reflect back on some of the things you accomplished in life against all odds. If you made it this far, you certainly have some experience overcoming big obstacles and rising above major challenges.  How did you do it?  What did you learn about yourself and your capabilities?  Soak that in. Remember you are stronger than this moment.
2. Ask for some feedback from people you respect and trust. This is especially helpful if you are feeling under attack from others. Seek out some of the people who have your back and ask them to remind you what’s “strong with you” instead of what’s “wrong with you.” We all need positive affirmation and appreciation, and sometimes we have to ask for it. And, by the way, reach out to someone who might be feeling “less than,” and let them know what you appreciate about them.  It may be just what they need right now and it will help you too!

3. Look at the bigger picture of your life. Often, that doubt, or lack of confidence, is tied to a single experience or interaction with another person.  Take a step back and look at the other elements in your life that are more affirming.  Your professional expertise, your family, your friends, your pets, your passions, and your hobbies can all be sources of greater satisfaction. Focus some time, energy, and attention in that direction.

Finally, give yourself some grace.  Having worked around high performers, and people with high potential, high aspirations, and high expectations most of my life, one thing I know for sure: You cannot be super-human all the time.  We all have our moments. 

Share this with someone who might need to read it today.  And if you need some more help with building your level of confidence, it may be time to consider joining my high-performance group coaching program. Learn more here.